5 Ways to Start Letting Go of Unhelpful Thoughts and Limiting Beliefs
collaborative blog written by Isabel Carrington & Jasmine Irven
New beginnings, opportunities and fresh starts are concepts many of us seemingly love to welcome into our lives.
The problem oftentimes though, is that we’re stuck in old patterns, limiting beliefs or unhelpful habits that hold us back.
Our subconscious beliefs are the stories that have been ingrained in our minds by those who raised us, who we’ve been influenced by, past experiences and/or what society tells us is “right or wrong.”
And our limiting beliefs specifically, are subconscious thoughts that restrict us in some way. They tell us what we “can” or “can’t” do, what we’re capable of, or how we’re “supposed to” show up.
If you’ve ever had the belief that you can’t make over a certain salary or that you wouldn’t be successful at a certain job, these are incredibly limiting thoughts. And what’s worse, these beliefs are also very powerful. Our beliefs impact our actions, which ultimately decide how our lives play out.
If you don’t believe you’ll be successful in a certain area, you likely won’t even allow yourself to try; you self-sabotage before even beginning to test, play, and explore your potential.
And so, as much as possible we want to become aware of what we’re thinking, the stories we’re telling ourselves, and the beliefs we hold, so that we can determine what’s serving us and what isn’t, and make better decisions for moving forward.
When we start to recognize and let go of old stories that no longer serve us, we’re allowing ourselves to move forward powerfully, to manifest our desires and to create the life of our dreams.
Throughout this process of recognizing and releasing please remember to be gentle with yourself. Unwiring our limiting beliefs is not an easy thing to do!
Here are 5 practices you can use to begin exploring and unraveling these beliefs.
journaling
Journaling is an incredibly powerful reflective practice that can help you identify what your unhelpful thoughts and limiting beliefs might be.
Using a journal can help us pinpoint what weighs heavy on our hearts, and can put things into perspective.
If you’ve never journaled before, consider starting with free flow journaling.
That is, simply writing down what comes out naturally. This practice is a great technique to start becoming aware of your thought patterns, what’s taking up space in your mind, and how you’re speaking to yourself.
This method of journaling can also be very therapeutic because it allows you to start clearing your mind; transferring all of the things that are on your mind and potentially causing you overwhelm or grief, onto paper.
From here, to dive a little deeper, we recommend starting to journal on your main beliefs about life to see what comes up. You’ll know your belief is a limiting one if it feels uncomfortable or restrictive.
Once you have a good understanding of what your limiting beliefs are, try to question them, reframe them and rewrite them as affirmations.
For example - if a belief that came up is, “money is hard to attain because I lack education,” you can look for evidence that that simply isn’t true.
Look for stories of wealthy people who didn’t graduate high-school or university or successful people who didn’t follow a traditional educational path. Or, look for instances in your own life where money showed up easily and effortlessly. Have you ever found money on the sidewalk? Ever received money unexpectedly in a card for your birthday? You didn’t have to work hard for that money, did you?!
When we start to prove ourselves wrong by finding evidence that debunks our belief, we’re allowing our limiting beliefs to start to unravel. From here, we can bring in new affirmations to begin creating a new baseline and belief.
For example in this scenario, maybe a more supportive belief to start repeating when you notice you’re questioning your worth and ability to make money is, “I am choosing to believe I am worthy and deserving of financial success. I am smart. I am capable. I can create change in my life.”
Pro tip: write down your limiting beliefs on a separate piece of paper so you can safely burn or rip up the paper afterwards as a symbol to the universe that you are letting go!
breathwork
Breathwork is another great tool to use when working through our limiting beliefs. Our breath is super powerful and offers a beautiful way to release tension in the body and mind.
When you notice an unhelpful thought pop up, try using the box breathing method. This practice encourages you to inhale for four seconds, to hold your breath for four seconds, to exhale for the count of four and then to hold at the bottom for the count of four.
Allow yourself to feel the thought at its fullest capacity when you inhale and then imagine it leaving your subconscious as you exhale.
Notice how you feel after practicing this and if it feels good try it again for a few rounds!
If you find that this way of breathing is too much for you, simply take three deep breaths instead as this can be a helpful alternative.
The most important part of these breathing exercises, regardless of the technique you use, is that you visualize your negative thoughts being released from your mind, body and soul.
This really allows you to embody the feeling of releasing and letting go.
EFT tapping
Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) is an energetic practice that offers a sense of healing from physical pain, limiting beliefs, or other forms of emotional distress.
P.s. we do EFT tapping practices in our self-care club!
EFT involves tapping on different points of the body known as energetic meridians (similar to what would be used in acupuncture) to release blockages and shift stagnant or stuck energy.
According to Good Therapy, EFT tapping is one of the most effective ways of clearing out feelings and the limiting beliefs attached to them. This practice is a beautiful empowerment tool, allowing people to take charge of their emotional states at any time.
Throughout the practice you bring awareness and attention to the hurt or frustration you’re feeling, with a set-up statement:
“Even though ______ (insert pain, limiting belief, frustration here) I deeply love, honour and accept myself.”
Or, if the end of the statement feels untrue, you can rephrase to something like, “I am willing to learn to accept myself,” or “I am learning to love and accept myself.”
For example, “even though I am experiencing a lack of confidence, I am learning to deeply love and honour and accept myself.”
This set-up statement is said three times while the client taps on their karate chop point, and then moving through the rest of the points, bringing more awareness to the thoughts and feelings you’re experiencing.
On your last round of tapping, consider simply using affirmations. This is a great way to end the session; instilling confidence and positivity in your body and soul.
For more details on EFT tapping consider reading our previous blog post on the topic!
feel the feels
As mentioned earlier, unhelpful thoughts and limiting beliefs are uncomfortable to carry. So, we may try to ignore them or push them down.
However, continuing to resist what we naturally feel often only creates more turmoil.
Ever heard the saying, “what we resist, persists?”
If we’re constantly focusing on what we don’t want to be feeling or experiencing, we’re only going to draw more attention to it.
Sometimes we simply need to slow down for a moment and truly feel our feelings so that our emotions can flow through us quicker.
Know that it’s okay to be vulnerable. It’s okay to experience pain. It’s okay to be frustrated. It’s okay to recognize that you aren’t happy with where you are now.
It can be difficult to accept that our thoughts and beliefs may have resulted in bringing us to this point, but it’s also empowering to know that this means we can make the necessary changes to grow.
Our emotions are just visitors. They come to talk to us. So, sit with your emotions without judgement. Listen to what they’re trying to tell you. Eventually they will float away on their own.
Sitting in silence or listening to an audio meditation can be useful to become more aware of your feelings. Consider using an app like Insight Timer which offers thousands of free meditations and affirmations based on the subject you’re interested in.
Insight Timer has helped me to let go of my own negative thoughts and emotions through music, sounds and voice recordings. You might find that it also helps you along your journey.
Or, consider joining our membership for more meditations, journaling prompts, EFT practices and helpful tools to encourage you to be with yourself.
reframe your thoughts
To make sure that your new beliefs stick, tune in to affirmations and speak kindly to yourself as much as you can. Try to bring up the volume on your inner coach, and dial down the volume of your inner critic.
This affirmation video may be a beautiful tool to accompany you in your work of letting go of limiting beliefs. Listen or read helpful affirmations or repeat them to yourself daily to see the best results! In being consistent it’s more likely you will begin to see a change in your thought patterns.
Now, it is also important to note that there will be times where your limiting beliefs may start to reappear. Doing this work isn’t a linear process and there isn’t a finish line.
It requires your continuous focus, energy, and ability to rely on the tools you’ve found work for you.
When you notice a limiting belief popping up, thank it for coming back to you and then say ‘I no longer choose to take this on. Instead I am deciding to believe in a more positive thought’.
Continue to take back your power. Continue to reframe. Continue to remind yourself that you can always choose to feed your mind higher vibration thoughts.
give yourself grace
Throughout all of this, please remember how important it is to give yourself grace. Especially while clearing out old beliefs and unhelpful habits.
Humans are complex beings and perfection doesn’t exist. We make mistakes. We experience hard times. We fall back into old habits.
Healing is far from linear. It can be messy, exhausting and frustrating and that’s okay.
Know that you can continue to learn and grow from these experiences, as long as you take time to be with yourself.
Be gentle with yourself and acknowledge that figuring out what works best for you is a learning process.
final thoughts & journal prompts
In spite of all the talk about healing being a long journey, please know that you are worth it.
Know that your goals and intentions can most certainly be accomplished if your heart is set on change and you begin to take the small steps to get there.
Always believe that you have the capability to expand beyond the place that you are now.
Here are some journaling prompts that may help you start this process of discovering more about yourself.
Consider,
What stories do I often tell myself? Are they supportive or restrictive?
What thoughts can I take on in support of my highest self?
What do I need less and more of in my life?
What obstacles are in my way when it comes to reaching my goals?
Do my thoughts, actions and words align with what I believe and how I want to live?
How can I reframe my beliefs and thoughts to support my healing?
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about the author
ISABEL:
Isabel Carrington is a wellness enthusiast and content writer who cares deeply about living consciously.
She is most passionate about following daily rituals that support who we want to become. Like many, Isabel has often felt disconnected to herself both internally and outwardly.
While struggling through these emotions, she came to the realization that self-care and a safe space to heal is essential. Isabel has since started a business of wellness boxes, spread the word of self-compassion through different platforms and collaborated with like-minded brands and individuals.
She is always seeking to support educational, sustainable and ethically-minded projects. Her beliefs are that in order to live a fulfilling life, we must build a relationship with ourselves and be authentic to who we are.
JASMINE:
Jasmine is the founder of the Sustainable Bliss Collective, a Certified Meditation Teacher, and lover of all things health + wellness.
If you’re looking to work with Jasmine more closely consider joining our membership! She runs most of the meditations and self-care sessions in there.
If not, we hope her words here are enough to inspire + challenge you to embrace your own journey, enjoy the blissful moments of each day, and make an impact in this beautiful world we call home.
Recently I’ve felt the pull to embrace more of a slower living lifestyle. With this mindset shift I’m still moving through my morning with a few self-care rituals in mind, but there’s a lot less pressure behind them and a lot less rigidity to them.
Maybe you’ve felt this shift too. This urge to slow down, to breathe deeply, and to do less, while still incorporating intentional practices into your day and life.
If so, here are 4 flexible wellbeing rituals I try to fit into my mornings each day to help me feel my best, that might also work for you.